Category: Personal Musings

Personal observations from my hunt for God in the everyday things of life.

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Personal Musings What I'm doing

You Collect What?

It’s not metal dogs but…

In 2020, I started a new hobby, collecting pictures of signs designed to change pet/owner behavior. It all started in March, which was a strange and terrible time. Everything in our community was shutdown. Our city looked like a ghost town. How do I know? My husband and I drove around every day for an hour or more, praying over our community. It was depressing and scary. I pleaded with God to lighten the mood and give us hope.

He answered me through a tiny sign planted in the gravel of someone’s yard. We drove by before I realized what I was seeing. I started laughing and told my husband to back-up so I could take a picture.

I honestly didn’t stage the picture – what you see is exactly what I saw. It probably appealed to me because I love fourth-grade toilet humor. My dad was a plumbing wholesale manufacturer’s representative, who kept me laughing with tall tales regarding bodily functions and the various items we use for disposal. Anyway, the picture of that little four-inch sign still makes me chuckle, but it also started me on a quest to find as many of that type of signage as possible.

A Small Portion of My Sign Collection

I’ve assembled an impressive collection in the past ten months. Some are scary or angry, and some spout legalese, which doesn’t seem to be factual, according to my research. Others are cute or funny. God has been using these signs like a flashing light to get me to pray for the people’s hearts on both sides of those signs. They remind me to be civil and respectful and to have respect for others. The signs also remind me to ask for God’s help to be loving and kind when I feel disrespected.

Whose responsibility?

The humor in my latest finds found five feet from each other, point out the absurdity of our expectations sometimes, and reminds us to laugh at ourselves.

I appreciate that God uses my quirky hobby to remind me of bigger concepts.  I’m curious. Do you have any odd hobbies that God uses in your life? Do you ever think God has a strange sense of humor? What makes you smile when you are feeling blue? Where are you finding God-smiles in the middle of the physical and mental drama going on around us?

If you can’t answer any of those questions, ask God to lighten your mood and give you hope. Then let me know how He answers.

I’m praying for wide-open eyes for you to see the small things that will make you smile.

Andrea Sanger

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Personal Musings What I'm doing

I’ve Done It!

First Draft Notebook

On Christmas Day, I met a goal I’ve been working toward for a long time. I finished the first draft of my memoir. The 486 double-spaced pages with wide margins mean I have a lot of revising and editing ahead of me. 

The point of telling you this isn’t so you’ll be impressed with the number of words or pages, but to celebrate a step in a long-term dream of being a published author.

Along the way, I’ve learned a lot.

First, I’m thankful for all the teachers who encouraged my love of the written word. I’m terribly sorry I didn’t listen more closely when they were trying to teach me the grammar rules.

Second, I’m glad I’ve kept a journal, calendars with notes, photo albums with captions, and other tidbits. I couldn’t have gotten this far without all the junk stashed in boxes.

Third, although writing looks like a solitary endeavor, it never is.

Imagine my husband having to deal with me being angry over the past. He never knew if it was something he did today or an incident from twenty years ago, as I processed those moments to write them with genuine feeling.

I also have a fantastic friend who reads all my junky writing and cleans it up, so I can share it with my writing group that pushes me to be the writer I dream I will be someday.

Fourth, and I think the most important – none of this would have happened without God’s intervention. I’m still not sure anyone will want to read what I’ve written, but that doesn’t matter. The process has been a study in following the leading of God. Over the past twenty-five years, God has prompted people to tell me to write a book. I kept demurring, but God kept nudging me with the idea that I needed to write, write, write. It was quite annoying.

Then on November 16th, 2020, I felt God challenge me to 40-days of sacrificial writing. The concept was to write every day no matter what I felt like or what excuse I could conger up. I wrote fifty-two scenes amounting to a little over 50,000 words. The challenge proved to me I can do anything that God wants me to do, even if I think it’s impossible or I’m not feeling it. I sensed Him sitting in the room with me, cheering me on at 11:30 pm when I wanted to be in bed. “Just a little more, you can do it!”

So, whatever dream or heart’s desire you’ve put on a shelf for another day, I want to say God is waiting for you. He wants to come alongside you with encouragement and vision for that completed project. Please let Him help you. It’s worth it. The sense of accomplishment is fantastic – even if nobody else will appreciate what you’ve done, you’ll know, and your connection with God will grow.

I’m praying that many dreams and visions will come into the light through you!

Andrea Sanger

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New To Us? Personal Musings

Words Change Things

Words Over My Weeks
WORDS TO INSPIRE

Last October, God and I had some fun. Together we came up with a word to pray over each week of this year. I’m amazed at how God has met my needs through those words. For example, when my cancer surgery was postponed due to a blood clot in my leg, my word was JOY. I know, what a horrible word when I was stressed and in pain. However, it was perfect for that week. God infused incredible JOY into the mess by showing me that postponing the surgery meant thousands of dollars saved. God also made it clear that I could trust Him to take care of me in all situations, the most joyful thing of all.

So, my word for this week is COLOR. I admit that this is a weird word, and I wondered how God would pull off COLOR. (I don’t usually look at the words ahead of time because I want God to do it without me trying to make it happen.)

In setting my goals for this month, I wanted to learn some new things. I chose to learn how to use the Canva app. I’ve used other publishing/design programs in the past and wanted to upgrade my skillset with a new product. As it turns out, they have multiple courses to get a newbie up and running. I chose to watch the ones on design to see how they use their product. To my surprise, about half of the course was about COLOR. Yep, God snuck in COLOR through a computer app this time.

As I watched the course, I realized that I wanted to update my blog’s colors to reflect the changes in me. God showed me that the grey cloud hanging over my head is lifting, and I need to release that into my work, so I have intensified the colors. The change corresponds to God releasing more drive and purpose into my life – I have things to do, people to see, and hope for a bright future.

All the reflection on color also made me realize that the content of my blog is also shifting. It feels more personal, more about the ways God enhances my life every day, and what it can do in yours. The texture of my life has changed, as God reveals Himself daily in the little things. So, from now on, I plan to focus on how God is in the details of life.

I look forward to the crazy things God is going to do in, through, and for me this coming year. I’m already asking Him to give me a new set of words for my weeks (November 2020 – October 2021).

WORD OVER MY WEEKS

I hope you will join me in asking God for words over your weeks. It’s simple: sit down with a calendar, ask God what word He wants for each week, then write whatever comes to your mind. I understand that sounds weird — but trust me — and it’s fun. It’s even more exciting to see later how those words were important.

Praying that you enjoy words from God!

Andrea

P.S. By the time this blog is posted, my word will be TEXTURE. It just makes me laugh.

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Personal Musings

ON THE ROAD

Long Straight Road

I’m not a fan of long-distance driving. However, it’s something we do on a regular basis, making the round trip to Seattle and back to the desert.

To make the drive more interesting this summer, my husband decided to deviate from driving the I-5 and take a less-traveled route through Bishop, CA, onto the US Route 95, through Nevada, Oregon, and Idaho. I was looking forward to the change. Little did I know that the road through Nevada is even more boring than I-5 through the San Joaquin Valley. The terrain was a flat desert, with almost no signs of human life for miles in any direction. The road was designed by someone who liked straight lines. We joked about the fact that we could predict where we’d be in an hour and how thrilling it was to encounter another vehicle.

Though the monotony got to me, I felt at peace. Leaving behind traffic and being on a less-used route provided time to relax and enjoy the beautiful clear blue skies and the companionship of being with my best friend.

Smoke clouding our view of Mt. Shasta

Our trip home was vastly different. On the way home, we sped down the highway with packs of other vehicles.  By the time we arrived in Medford, Oregon, the smoke from the fires blazing away in California changed the color of the sky to a dingy brownish blue. When we stopped briefly in Red Bluff, we were inundated with smoke – our throats got sore and our eyes burned, and the visibility dropped to about two miles on either side of the highway. Since I-5 south of Sacramento was the perimeter line for one of the larger fires, we chose to travel on the old 99. In my 58 years of journeying up and down the west coast, the 99 has always been under construction, which requires intense concentration to stay safe. The stress of driving this bumpy, ever-changing stretch of road, was made worse by the immense number of trucks and cars joining us in avoiding the fire. By the time we arrived in Bakersfield, we were both snappish and ready for our trip to be done.

Lone tree along the 99

At this point, it occurred to me that our road trip resembled my life with God. I pray for the long, smooth, and trouble-free roads – the ones that give me a lot of time to sit back and enjoy my relationship with God and others on the ride with me. However, the reality of my life is that I’m constantly under construction – changing and growing, based on the new seasons in my life. I tend to be hyperalert to the things that might cause us to crash or bring harm to someone else. All the while, I’m in a figurative haze, trying to grasp what God is doing around me, and am unable to speak, because I’m choked with fear or overwhelmed by the immensity of the situation.

But the grace of God is irresistible. Just when I think I cannot take any more, He gives me a reprieve – much like the last leg of our journey home through the Mojave Desert and down through Yucca, where we again had wide-open spaces, straight roads with fewer vehicles, and plenty of time to unwind, laugh and talk about our trip together.

As I contemplate our trip in retrospect, I realize how much God was in the details of each part of the journey. I’m so glad I got to experience: Mono Lake at dusk, the wide-open spaces of Western Nevada, the ranchlands of Oregon and Idaho, the Columbia River shimmering like a blue snake amongst the wheat fields of Eastern Washington, the amazing smokey sunset in Red Bluff, the hazy sky that made the lone tree in a field stand out in stark contrast to the landscape, the first glimpse of Mt San Jacinto as we dropped down through Morongo Valley, and the windmills indicating I was reentering my town. Each of these sights along the way highlights the diversity of God’s creation and how together they make a beautiful picture of my life with Him. God and I are on a trip that is ever-changing, full of immense beauty and potential hazards, but I’m always surrounded by His unconditionally love, which gives me a sense of wonder and peace in any situation.

Sunset in Red Bluff, CA

No matter where you are in your life’s journey — be it the peaceful, straight road or the busy, perilous road – take comfort in knowing that God is with you. I encourage you to look for God in the unusual details. How is He trying to communicate with you through the landscape of your life?

Praying that you can live in the wonder of God’s diversity!

Andrea Sanger 

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Personal Musings

How Good is Your Sight?

Andrea's many eyeglasses and cases on a table.

The other day I was reading “The Exercise of Prophecy” by Graham Cooke when I came upon the following quote:

“Without a sense of objective, we sometimes fudge the words or pad the prophecy with too many human insights. We see a blurrier picture because we do not have a sharp focus on what God wants to do.” 

When I read that, it made me take a step back and review one of my previous journal entries, from when I had asked God to tell me what he was thinking (practicing the challenge from the Itching Ears blog). I felt God had said to me, “My love, you have a great day. Look for My surprises awaiting you. A good day is ahead.” Based on that I was filled with hope. I thought it was a direct answer to my fears about my day ahead. 

That day, I was going to have to brave the world so that I could get new glasses. I’d put this off for over eight months, first for cancer surgery, then for Covid-19. Well, to tell the truth, I also put it off because buying glasses is traumatic for me.

Every time I buy glasses, I relive the stress of having seven surgeries on my left eye. I had two separate retinal detachments and a cataract, which grew because of the things they did during the operations for the retina. It takes a lot of effort to talk myself into going to the optometrist to get the prescription, but even more to go to an optical shop.

Crazy right? But trying to find new frames and dealing with the exorbitant cost sends me over the edge. Unlike David, who’s able to buy all-in-one glasses, I generally end up buying seven pairs at a time. Why? I need bifocal for distance/mid-range in sunglass and regular eyeglass for driving. Then I need single-focus lenses for distance, computer, and three pairs of reading glasses (each for different places that I read.) I tried the transition glasses, but that was terrifying. I kept falling and bumping into things.

Anyway, after that excellent time with God, I set out with a spring in my step and hope that this trip to the optical store would be fun. However, about ten minutes into my appointment, I was so stressed, I became snarky with my husband and finally, stalked out of the store in a huff. Not pretty. When I got in the car, I started crying and had a major pity party. With the stupid Coronavirus shutdowns, I knew it would be another week before I could get another appointment in a different store.

After a few minutes, I got quiet, but in my mind, I was railing at God for not fulfilling His promises from earlier. What kind of God sets someone up for that kind of disappointment? Didn’t He know how tough this day would be without what I just went through?

My superstar husband, who always tries to fix my problems, even when I don’t want him too, drove off to another store and boldly walked in and told them we just wanted to look around. Everyone in the place was giving us the evil eye. But I found a sunglass frame that fit all my criteria. A win considering all the details I must take into consideration when buying new frames. The bad news was that without an appointment I couldn’t buy them, and it would be two and a half weeks before they had an opening. I wanted to cry again, but at least I found something. I made the appointment just in case I couldn’t find anything better.

We drove home without successfully getting any glasses. I went off to my office to do anything that would keep me from focusing on my disappointment over the outcome of the day.

About an hour later, my husband came in and announced that he found the frames I liked on the internet and that they were $100 cheaper than what we had looked at, and I could have them in less than a week.

The next day he told me he’d found a place that could see us in a couple of days and replace the lenses in the frames I already had and liked – at 40% off each pair after the first one. Unbelievable, both David and I would be able to get new lenses at that rate. Not only were we going to get a reasonable price, but they were bringing in an optician early so we could have the store to ourselves – VIP treatment.

Finally, I got what God was trying to teach me.  I gave myself a good scolding and apologized to God for interpreting what He said to me in a way that suited my desires. I felt Him chuckling and saying, “That’s okay. I just wanted you to fully grasp what it means ‘to pad with human insight’ what I’m saying to you.”

It’s not a lesson I will forget anytime soon, since He provided an everyday reminder in my glasses – those things that give me human sight.

Are you or have you been angry at God for His not living up to your expectations? Are you sure His plans and timing aren’t better for you? I know it’s hard to keep our wishes and desires from coloring how we perceive God. Still, I challenge you to wait and see – instead of jumping to conclusions based on what you think, not on what God is actually doing.

Praying that God gives you great insight and the wisdom to see it played out in His time!

Andrea

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Personal Musings

ITCHING EARS

The five dog sculptures remind me of everyone voicing their own opinions. Howling into the wind.
EVERYBODY HAS SOMETHING TO SAY

Are your itching ears being satisfied by what you hear, see, read, and share?

I will admit that I hate watching or reading the news and always have. Even as a small child, I could feel fear hurled at me through news outlets.

However, over the past few months, I have been inundated with “news” through my social media feeds. I am frustrated with what I’m exposed too.

You may be thinking at this point “Great, I can agree with that,” but wait. I’m frustrated because as an eighth-grader I was exposed to 2 Timothy 4:2-4:

“Preach the word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction. For the time will come when people will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear.They will turn their ears away from the truth and turn aside to myths.”

Where is the truth? Who is telling the truth? It doesn’t matter what side you lean toward, there are thousands of teachers, leaders, friends ready to say to you that you are right. It is astounding to me that 2 Timothy is being played out right before my eyes.

With excess time on my hands, I decided to learn more about Godly dreams that fulfill the prophetic words in Joel 2:28-29.  God says people will dream dreams and see visions. So, I asked God to give me new dreams. The first one I had after that prayer revealed that many of God’s gifts and attributes are hidden behind closed doors. The only one that was released was TRUTH.

In my dream, I asked, “Why?”

God’s answer, “I need My truth to permeate the world – the real TRUTH. The truth of My Son, who is the WAY, the TRUTH, and the LIFE.” (John 14:6) Then I woke up.

As a result of this dream, I’ve spent time observing what is going on from a different perspective. I’m convinced that God’s TRUTH is getting lost in the flood of good opinions.

You may ask, at this point, how would His TRUTH be displayed or determined? Here’s the tricky part for each of us – are we going to interpret that question according to our pre-existing thinking, or are we going to actually take time to seek God’s face, to get quiet before Him and listen, and I mean really listen.

Let’s take a little test:

How many of you have or are experiencing fear because of what you are hearing and seeing?

The Bible has a lot to say about fear like:

I John 4:18

“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.”

Or read: 

Psalm 91

I will say that I’m not yet made perfect in love, because I’m often blindsided by fear with all that is going on in the world and my personal life. I have to forcefully remind myself that God is bigger than all the bad stuff, and only He understands all of the moving parts.

In my quest to cope with the bad stuff, I turned to the book of Job in the Bible. For thirty-seven chapters, everyone gives their opinions of why bad things are happening to Job and expect him to act according to their thoughts. Then in chapter thirty-eight, the Lord starts speaking, and He is not happy – Job and his friends get a tongue lashing. Finally, Job puts his hand over his mouth until almost the end when he says in verse 3 of chapter 42: 

“You asked, ‘Who is this that obscures my plans without knowledge?’
    Surely I spoke of things I did not understand,
    things too wonderful for me to know.”

Maybe, just maybe, we need to put our hands over our mouths before we speak and listen to God for direction and guidance. I know it’s hard when there is so much coming at us from all directions, but God’s TRUTH will win the day every time.

Here’s my challenge to you (something I do consistently):

  1. Immerse yourself in the Bible regularly (reading or listening) – get a feel for how God reveals Himself through the words and stories.
  2. Then take time to ask God what He is thinking – start with 5 minutes and write down what comes into your head. Use the Bible to “Fact Check” – does what you’ve written confirm what you’re reading or contradict it?

Over time your ears will only itch to hear God’s Truth, and you will be able to pick it out of the crowd of voices, and it will release love, and not fear. (John 10:2-5)

Andrea

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Personal Musings

LOSS OF HOPE

A PRESENT FROM GOD FOR MY ENJOYMENT

I wrote the following to myself on 1/5/20, but it’s a helpful reminder as we all face quarantine and loss during COVID-19.

When do you feel the most hopeless?

  • When I’m unproductive
  • When I’m not learning new things
  • When I’m tired
  • When I’m not active enough
  • When I don’t get out of the house to see the world around me
  • When I’m not creative

What happens to you when hopeless sets in?

  • I get sluggish
  • I become grumpy – nothing in the world is good
  • I’m unable to see God at work in me or the world
  • I’m unwilling even to look to see if God might be doing something

My normal state of mind is looking for what God is doing, which is how this blog got its name, “On A God Hunt.” I see Him working throughout the day. I rejoice in the small things, enjoying the little surprises that He puts in my path.

However, when I’m not feeling well, or life isn’t going the way I want it, the ability to find God’s presents seems to disappear. Instead, I roll over and my pessimistic underbelly appears. Internally I know God is still there doing great things. I just don’t care. I want to wallow in the muck, having a pity party. My mind drifts off to the frivolous or mind-numbing so that I can avoid life.

No, I don’t give up my faith, but I do abdicate my joy. I give away the vision that allows me to see the bright colors, and I only see gray. I miss the fantastic synergy in the co-existence of all the different aspects of the world, the pure beauty in creation like the common garden rock. God made each part for my enjoyment, and their working together creates impressive things, but at that moment, I don’t care.

When I finally recognize that I’ve abdicated my joy, I can begin to refocus, by cleaning up my God glasses. It’s then that I realize that even simple things are essential to my existence. My God has a much bigger plan than I can understand. It’s just waiting for me to turn away from my pessimistic underbelly and embrace the process of surrendering my circumstances and give my whole being over to His control. Only then do I regain my joy in the small things: seeing the cactus that’s blooming because of the recent rain, the bunny sneaking down my side yard to grab a bite of my bushes, the palm frond glistening in the afternoon breeze like emeralds in the sky, or the wave from the neighbor walking down the street. Each rather insignificant by itself but put all together, they create the fabric of a precious life.

Shake the rust off and enjoy life!

I encourage you to grab hold of your joy – look for the little presents God puts in your path for your enjoyment. JOY is a battle cry in stressful situations – it changes our perspective. It gives us hope. It allows us to help others, and most of all, it connects us with God.

I’m praying for you!
Andrea

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My City-My Valley Personal Musings

PRAY FOR EVERY STREET – EVERY HOME – EVERY BUSINESS

Palm Springs Ghost Town
DOWNTOWN PALM SPRINGS DURING COVID-19 QUARANTINE
THE HEIGHT OF OUR TOURIST SEASON

“Social Distancing” and “Sheltering at Home” are phrases that have become our new normal. As tragic as this is, I know we will survive. For the eight weeks before these concepts became our collective norm – I had been sheltering in place and social distancing, while stuck in my house, recovering from cancer surgery. I’m keenly aware of the stir-crazy feeling many will experience during the COVID-19 crisis. The way I stayed sane was by keeping busy – having a purpose. I crocheted hats and scarves for the homeless. Those days when all I could do was sit, I often felt hopeless and helpless, even though I know that is not God’s plan for me.

I’m now supposed to go out walking to rebuild my strength. This past Sunday, as I was walking with my husband, God reminded me of my long-standing dream, that “Every Street – Every Home and Every Business” in my community would receive prayer. Over the years, I’ve seen The Church in the Coachella Valley come together to begin this process. However, God showed me that He has set up a perfect scenario for my dream to be completed!

The Executive Orders in many cities are now telling us we can only go out for “Essential Activities” if we maintain “Social Distancing Requirements.” For example, an excerpt from the March 17th Executive Order from the City of Palm Springs states:

“Social Distancing Requirements”
For purposes of this order “Social Distancing Requirements” includes maintaining at least six-foot social distancing from other individuals, washing hands with soap and water for at least twenty seconds as frequently as possible or using hand sanitizer, covering coughs or sneezes (into the sleeve or elbow, not hands), regularly cleaning high-touch surfaces, and not shaking hand, and such other standards or guidelines as may be promulgated from time to time by  City, County, State and federal authorities.

“Essential Activities”
iii  “To engage in outdoor activity, provided the individuals comply with Social Distancing Requirements as defined in this Section, such as, by way of example and without limitation, walking, hiking, or running.”

I want to challenge you to follow the “Essential Activity” order by putting prayer before walking, hiking, running, cycling, or while driving to and from essential activities. If every Christian takes advantage of these orders, we could make my dream come true: Every Street – Every Home and Every Business being prayed over while we face down the COVID-19 crisis.

I believe this simple task is a God-given purpose for this time – something that will change the world as we seek the Healer for our communities, while we stay active in mind and body. I use the following as a reminder as I B.L.E.S.S. my community through prayer walks/drives:

Body – Pray for health, protection, and safety.
Labor – Pray for work, income, and security.
Emotional – Pray for joy, peace, and health.
Social – Pray for love, marriages, families, and friends.
Spiritual – Pray for salvation, faith, and grace.

https://blesseveryhome.com/B.L.E.S.S_Acronym_Compilation.pdf

I’ve also turned my prayer walks/drives into picture scavenger hunts using the camera on my phone. These hunts remind me of my amazing neighbors (yard art), and God’s creativity (plants, flowers, clouds, landscapes). Each of these photo albums serve as a memorial marker of what I’m doing with God.

I’m praying you will join me in this adventure.

Andrea

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Personal Musings

Ultimate Upgrade

Andrea in the hospital after cancer surgery.
OVERNIGHT STAY IN THE HOPTIAL

The past few months have been a wild ride. In the process, I’ve lost a lot of my fear of death. With the diagnoses of cancer, I went through all the typical thoughts:

  • Will surgery cure me?
  • Will I need chemo or radiation treatments?
  • How will the outcome affect the people around me?
  • Will I die from this?
  • How will we pay for this?
  • Then, how sick will I be from the surgery itself?

Then God did something amazing to show me how much He loves me.

On the scheduled day of surgery, I woke up with a blood clot in my leg. I reported to the pre-op, had IV’s hooked-up, met with my surgeon, had an ultrasound, and met the anesthesiologist for my surgery. After five hours of lying around, I was sent home with an appointment to visit a Vascular Specialist. The next couple of weeks were a wild ride, with more ultrasounds, as the clot moved up my leg. The medication to reduce the lump made me sick, and fear of the cancer spreading grew as we waited for the swelling to go down in my leg.

Finally, a month later, surgery was again scheduled. In the meantime, we adjusted our medical insurance, which reduced our out of pocket expenses significantly. I had Christmas at home. God worked all things for my good. I calmed down, and my fear lifted.

The weekend before my surgery, a friend said to me, “I see an angel in the OR watching out for you.” I laughed, thinking what a random comment, but the morning of the surgery, my OR nurse introduced herself – “I’m Angela, your OR nurse. Think of me as your angel watching out for you during the operation.” God’s sense of humor strikes again.

Then the anesthesiologist for my surgery came in, and it was clear that God is in the details. I fear anesthesia because my body reacts negatively to the drugs. To put this in perspective, I had shoulder surgery three years ago. It took six hours for me to wake-up (in the end, a recovery nurse stuck an alcohol swab under my nose, so I would wake-up enough to go home), and I spent two days nauseated. However, a year later, when my other shoulder needed surgery, the outcome was different. The anesthesiologist, standing in front of us, worked a miracle, getting me out of the hospital within two hours without nausea. God postponed the first cancer surgery so that I would have this doctor taking care of my anesthesia.

I came out of surgery with little to no nausea. Amazing, considering that there were six incisions in my stomach, one of which was extra swollen because they needed to cauterize a vein. After leaving the hospital, I never took narcotics for pain, and a week later, I found out that they got all the cancer with clear/clean margins.

I realized, that for me, having cancer is less fearful than surgery and that cancer treatment is scarier than death. I know without a doubt that God has the number of my days perfectly planned. In fact, I now see death as the ultimate upgrade – free of pain, rejoicing in heaven with Papa God, having finished the race that was set before me. Where are you in your journey? Are you ready for your ultimate upgrade?

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My City-My Valley Personal Musings

Rainbow Prayers

Rainbow Flag Flying Over Palm Springs
The rainbow flag that revealed a new aspect of God’s love to me.

Living in a community where I regularly see rainbow flags flying, I shouldn’t have been surprised when God grabbed my attention with one on a Sunday morning during our Breakfast and Bible Study group as I looked out the window and saw a giant one flying over the city.

At that moment, I saw the rainbow flag through a different set of eyes. It was as if I got a God’s eye view of our efforts to be noticed and protected by Him. From my vantage point, the flag looked small in comparison to the vastness of the landscape around it, even though to the people under it, the flag would have seemed huge. A lot of the time, I think I’m doing something big for God, but is it?

The flag hung there limply for several minutes. Then I saw the wind begin to move the tops of the trees around us then move down into the valley, until the flag unfurled in a splendor of bright colors. It struck me that without the wind of the Holy Spirit, all my efforts are not worth much. I’m like that flag wrapped around the crane, just waiting for something to move me.

Yes, I lost track of what was going on in our Bible Study, as I pulled out my phone to look up the origin of the flag and what the colors symbolized. I also made a quick check of what the colors often signify in the Bible. There are some differences, but it didn’t seem important because my mind was already moving on in prayer, using the words assigned to the colors by the flag’s creator:

Red – Life
That life in Christ would become central in all our lives.

Orange – Healing
That God would pour out healing and restoration on people and my community.

Yellow – Sunlight
That the Son of Light (another name for Jesus) would shine on each person that they might know the warmth of His love.

Green – Nature
That all would see the Creator through nature.

Blue – Harmony or Serenity
That there would be calm unity in our diversity, which allows for real love and concern to be shared.

Purple – Spirit
That the Spirit of God would move in our lives, that we would live in the fullness of God’s plan for each of us.

In the weeks since this event, I’ve been praising God for giving me new insight into His loving nature. Now, no matter where I see the rainbow, up in the clouds, or as a flag, I take a moment to pray for the people and communities under it. I hope the next time you see a rainbow you will join me in praying!

Andrea