Cancer – Creative Prayer Coach

Andrea in the hospital after cancer surgery. — OVERNIGHT STAY IN THE HOPTIAL

The past few months have been a wild ride. In the process, I’ve lost a lot of my fear of death. With the diagnoses of cancer, I went through all the typical thoughts:

Will surgery cure me?
Will I need chemo or radiation treatments?
How will the outcome affect the people around me?
Will I die from this?
How will we pay for this?
Then, how sick will I be from the surgery itself?

Then God did something amazing to show me how much He loves me.

On the scheduled day of surgery, I woke up with a blood clot in my leg. I reported to the pre-op, had IV’s hooked-up, met with my surgeon, had an ultrasound, and met the anesthesiologist for my surgery. After five hours of lying around, I was sent home with an appointment to visit a Vascular Specialist. The next couple of weeks were a wild ride, with more ultrasounds, as the clot moved up my leg. The medication to reduce the lump made me sick, and fear of the cancer spreading grew as we waited for the swelling to go down in my leg.

Finally, a month later, surgery was again scheduled. In the meantime, we adjusted our medical insurance, which reduced our out of pocket expenses significantly. I had Christmas at home. God worked all things for my good. I calmed down, and my fear lifted.

The weekend before my surgery, a friend said to me, “I see an angel in the OR watching out for you.” I laughed, thinking what a random comment, but the morning of the surgery, my OR nurse introduced herself – “I’m Angela, your OR nurse. Think of me as your angel watching out for you during the operation.” God’s sense of humor strikes again.

Then the anesthesiologist for my surgery came in, and it was clear that God is in the details. I fear anesthesia because my body reacts negatively to the drugs. To put this in perspective, I had shoulder surgery three years ago. It took six hours for me to wake-up (in the end, a recovery nurse stuck an alcohol swab under my nose, so I would wake-up enough to go home), and I spent two days nauseated. However, a year later, when my other shoulder needed surgery, the outcome was different. The anesthesiologist, standing in front of us, worked a miracle, getting me out of the hospital within two hours without nausea. God postponed the first cancer surgery so that I would have this doctor taking care of my anesthesia.

I came out of surgery with little to no nausea. Amazing, considering that there were six incisions in my stomach, one of which was extra swollen because they needed to cauterize a vein. After leaving the hospital, I never took narcotics for pain, and a week later, I found out that they got all the cancer with clear/clean margins.

I realized, that for me, having cancer is less fearful than surgery and that cancer treatment is scarier than death. I know without a doubt that God has the number of my days perfectly planned. In fact, I now see death as the ultimate upgrade – free of pain, rejoicing in heaven with Papa God, having finished the race that was set before me. Where are you in your journey? Are you ready for your ultimate upgrade?

Enjoying the Moment

Fall at Lake Chelan — Enjoying Lake Chelan in the Fall

Early this past fall I took a trip to Lake Chelan in Washington and had planned to write this as soon as I returned from my trip. However, when I got home, I was diagnosed with cancer. Everything around me changed overnight, and I have spent the last month coming to terms with the season I’m in right now. It’s not bad, just different

In contrast, the fall is so quiet, and I could hear the squeak of the geese’s wings resisting the air as they flew over my head. The water was perfectly calm, and at one point, I was the only person sitting on the beach. Peaceful is the word that comes to mind.

Summer Floats — Beach time in the summer at Lake Chelan

Normally, my whole family (four generations worth) gather in the summer to enjoy the cold water and summer activities. However, this year, I had the privilege of a fall visit. The difference was stark. Not just because there were only three of us in my uncle’s condo (instead of 12-15), but the whole community was calm and laid back. The summers are frenetic – lots of people, constant movement from one activity to another – swimming, hiking, putt-putt golf, tennis, and more, with the background filled with birds chirping, bees buzzing, jet-skis and boats revving and people talking, laughing and shouting with joy.

The lack of activity and noise gave me the space to take in the changing season. The trees that had given us shade and fruit this year, had one last job before resting – to fill the horizon with brilliant shades of yellow, orange and red – a feast for the eyes. As their leaves fall off, details that went unseen in the bustle of the summer stand out like significant memories to be treasured. Even as the water of the lake was receding, things that were hidden in the depth and murkiness of water in motion became vivid monuments to the surprises waiting for us yet to discover. Creation reminding me that even now God is showing me new things – hidden things.

Crazy Mad Squirrel

As the nip in the air, the clouds in the sky and the shorter days encouraged me to bundle up, I was prompted to grasp hold of the moment and enjoy it by a funny little squirrel who climbed up a tree to give me a piece of his mind. He had a plan and my presence was messing that up. I find myself doing the same thing to God at times. I have a plan and He seems to mess it all up. After a few minutes of gyrating and chattering at me, the squirrel moved on with what needed to be done. I know God watches patiently as I do the same thing, but when I realize that His love and faithfulness is there for me – no matter what – I’m able to move on with life.

I’m so glad that I had time to sit back and reflect. God knew I would need to be ready for my next season. I needed to know He still had things to reveal to me and that slowing down can give me time to reflect on His greatness.

I know it can be difficult, but I pray that you can find a quiet moment to absorb the wonders of creation. God has something special to show you, too, no matter what season it is!